Men are from Mars…

men are, women are

 

“Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.” The implication of this phrase is that the female and male gender act differently, think differently, process things differently and simply are, in conclusion: different. There have been many a book written trying to grapple with just what these differences are, including one with the phrase as the title.

Although there is natural truth to be found in this understanding, I have always really struggled with addressing it. I do not like it, nor do I entirely agree with it as an absolute statement.

However, my problem is not with the designation of “differences,” but in the “male” and “female.” It is simply not true in all cases, and therefore is not something I can accept. It’s as inappropriate, to me, as saying “girls have long hair, boys have short hair.” The issue is with the implied “all”, and, as with most things, generalizations are usually not entirely accurate.

But, rest assured, this is not a post about sexism, feminism, or misogyny. This is a post attempting to discover the true reality behind the accepted idiom.

Surely, most people will accept the removal of the implied “all.” Not all females are feminine, and not all males are masculine. It, also, does not have anything to do with sexual preference as there are masculine heterosexual females, masculine homosexual males, and so on.

So then, “Masculinity is from Mars, Femininity is from Venus” seems to be more accurate.

So where does femininity and masculinity come from if not from the assumed sex? My belief, and it seems Biology would support this, is that it is the hormones: Testosterone, and Estrogen. Some others are in their too, but those two are the usual mainstream understood hormones.

I must digress here though.

It seems we are still different. We still disagree, and we still see things differently.

What exactly are the differences? How can we reconcile them? Can we come to understand each other and what can we do to better expedite this process? What expressions, acts, generalities of either is considered by media/mainstream as weaker in a harmful way? What is usually assumed to be a “masculine” or a “feminine” trait that is just another untrue generalization?

And so many more questions…. Pennies, many pennies for your Thoughts!

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